Thursday, August 18, 2011

Of Pineapples and Peaches

When I arrived home last night, I noticed, in place of the rotting melon, a beautiful large pineapple and a box of 12 of the largest peaches I have ever seen. Obviously the chief multi-tasking householder had again been busy at Costco.

From previous experience, I think the pineapple will slowly wither, become spongy, and generate fruit flies before ultimately accounting for part of the 20lbs of garbage I heft outside every Monday and Thursday morning and every Friday afternoon.

The peaches as well don't have too much hope. I'll tell you why. Last night I was attempting to explain a principle of astronomy to one of my children and since I was in my kitchen at the time, I spied the peaches and quickly picked one up to demonstrate the principle physically, intending to use the peach to represent the earth. A loud protest from the chief multi-tasking householder indicated that I was not to touch the peaches. I remonstrated that I was only using the peach as a prop, not intending to eat such a delectable morsel, which mollified her a bit. It was a sure sign that the peach was to be left to begin its long decline into ballast for our tall kitchen garbage bags and our obligation to continue justification for the town's payment to its trash collectors.

I asked Ms Multi-tasker "What about melons? I don't see any here."

"I'm buying them tomorrow."

2 comments:

related said...

If the chief multitasker can generate such humorous literature and bring home such an array of delicious and colorful fruits and fill the garbage bags in such an a "peeling" manner and still have fruit to give away and be able to entice animal life, ie frit flies into the house then I say Long Live Costco and bring it on!!! Related

big sis said...

excuse me but those peaches are going to be my shabbos dessert. i resent being compared to or called a garbage can